How to Have Multiple Orgasms: Tips for More Pleasure

In the world of sex, multiple orgasms can sometimes seem like the Holy Grail. To experience pleasure and sexual satisfaction over and over again—who wouldn’t want that? If you’re interested in the world of multiple orgasms, we’re here to help. Read on to learn about multiple orgasms and ways to increase your chances of having them.

What is an Orgasm?

Let’s start with the basics: an orgasm is the climactic moment of sex. During an orgasm, a series of reactions occur in your body. First, your sexual arousal peaks and causes muscle contractions throughout your genital area. Next, your muscles release and, along with that release, you experience extremely pleasurable feelings throughout the genital area and your body. This entire process can last between 30 seconds and a minute.

One way of understanding an orgasm is the Masters and Johnson’s Four-Phase Model:1

  • Excitement: This is the phase of increasing sexual arousal where blood rushes to your genitals and your heart rate quickens.
  • Plateau: The height of arousal. Your muscles tense. Your testicles will pull up towards your body, or your clitoris will retract under your clitoral hood.
  • Orgasm: Your muscles contract, then release. Many ejaculate in this stage.
  • Resolution: Your muscles relax, blood pressure goes down, and your body enters the refractory period.

Whether you have a penis or a vagina, you can ejaculate during an orgasm. While it’s more obvious among those with penises, it’s estimated that up to 70% of people with vaginas experience ejaculation, too.1

What Are Multiple Orgasms?

Multiple orgasms are exactly as they sound: more than one orgasm while having sex. For some, multiple orgasms may occur quickly, with only a few minutes between each. For others, there may be more extended time between each orgasm, with a period of rest and recuperation between each orgasm.

Can Everyone Have Multiple Orgasms?

For many, multiple orgasms sound like a dream. Who wouldn’t want to experience sexual pleasure and satisfaction over and over? Unfortunately, having multiple orgasms can be more challenging than you may think.

The Refractory Period

In order to understand multiple orgasms, it’s important to understand the concept of a refractory period. This occurs during the resolution stage of Masters and Johnson’s Four Stage Model. During the refractory period, the body is unable to become aroused and orgasm isn’t possible. There’s also a mental component during the refractory period; many will find themselves satisfied, tired, and uninterested in sex during this time.

While there is some debate about it, everyone has a refractory period, regardless of their sex. However, the length of the refractory period varies greatly by sex:

  • For people with penises: During the refractory period, a penis cannot become erect, so orgasm isn't possible during this time. The refractory period for people with penises may last anywhere from a few minutes to 24 hours or longer. Scientists believe this may be due to a peptide called somatostatin, which reduces sexual arousal after ejaculation.
  • For people with vaginas: For those with vaginas, the refractory period tends to be much shorter. It can be anywhere from a few seconds to several minutes, though for some it’s longer.

A second (or third or fourth) orgasm simply isn’t possible until you’ve left the refractory period, so a shorter refractory period ups your chances of having multiple orgasms.

Other Factors Affecting Multiple Orgasms

Sex isn’t the only factor that may determine whether you can have multiple orgasms or not. Other factors that play a role in your ability to achieve multiple orgasms include:

  • Age: The older you are, the more difficult it becomes to have multiple orgasms. Typically, sexual behavior changes around age 40.3
  • Solo or partnered sex: There’s some evidence that the refractory period is much shorter during masturbation than it is when you’re having sex with a partner. Therefore, it may be easier to have multiple orgasms alone than it is during partnered sex.
  • Overall health: Because overall health can affect your ability to become aroused, it can also affect your chances of having multiple orgasms.

Techniques for Having Multiple Orgasms

Want to try your hand at having multiple orgasms? There are some techniques that may be able to help. Next time you’re getting down and dirty, use these tips to up your chances of having multiple orgasms.

Don't Force It

Though it may seem counterintuitive, the first step to having multiple orgasms is letting go of the pressure to have multiple orgasms. Too much pressure during sex can lead to performance anxiety, which can limit your ability to stay aroused, present, and come to orgasm, period.

There’s science behind it, too. Much of the increase in sensation we feel during sex has to do with an increase in blood flow to our genitalia. This increased blood flow causes penises to become erect and vaginas to become sensitive. Performance anxiety can cause an uptick in stress hormones like cortisol. As cortisol increases, your blood vessels narrow, allowing less blood to flow into your genitals and reducing your physical arousal and sensation.

There are certain things to know if you can’t orgasm. In order to have multiple orgasms, it’s important to stay relaxed and present. Though we may call it “performance anxiety,” sex isn’t a performance, and multiple orgasms aren’t a badge of honor. It’s simply a chance to try something new, learn about yourself and your partner, and experience increased pleasure. Have fun with it!

Communicate With Your Partner

As with any type of sex, it’s important to stay communicative with your partner in order to have multiple orgasms. In order to help you have another orgasm, your partner needs to know what feels good and what doesn’t. If they need to try a different angle, ask them to. If something feels good, let them know so that they can keep going! It’s all about communication.

Another important thing to communicate with your partner is when to stop. If you’re feeling too sensitive or something is starting to hurt, stop and take a break. You may find that a bit of rest is just what you need to reduce sensitivity and get things feeling good again.

Change Up the Positions

After an orgasm, many find that they have increased sensitivity and certain positions that felt good during the first round of sex don’t feel good any longer. In order to have another orgasm, it may help to explore new positions to try if you can’t orgasm multiple times. This can increase sensation in new places that feel good and decrease sensation in places that are simply too sensitive or tender at the moment.

If you had your first orgasm in missionary, maybe it’s a good time to try and have the next orgasm in cowgirl, or even to have sex standing up. You can also explore sex positions to make him last longer if you find he’s reaching orgasm too quickly. Changing positions can open the door to new sensations and another orgasm.

Try Different Kinds of Stimulation

Another way to have multiple orgasms when you’re experiencing increased sensitivity and tenderness in your genital area is to focus elsewhere. While your genitals may be the primary source of sexual arousal and pleasure, they aren’t the only ones.

To have your next orgasm, try stimulating your other erogenous zones. These may include areas like your lower back, inner thighs, breasts and nipples, neck, and even your armpits or the soles of your feet. Focus your attention on these areas and give your genitals a chance to recover. Doing so may help you stay aroused during the refractory period or become re-aroused afterward.

Try Using Sex Toys

Another roadblock to achieving multiple orgasms with a partner can occur when you’re ready for another go, but your partner isn’t. By the time you’ve exited the refractory period, your partner may be unable to become erect, or their vagina may be too sensitive for penetration. If this is the case, it’s time to call in the backups.

Sex toys can be a great way for one partner to receive pleasure while the other partner is still resting. Whether penetrating with a dildo, stimulating with a vibrator, or using another fun toy, a new sex toy may be the key to your next orgasm.

Conclusion

Multiple orgasms are a fun and exciting way to experience new pleasures with your partner or by yourself. By using these tips, you can up your chances of multiple orgasms and increase your pleasure.

Whether you’re on your first orgasm or your fifth, safe sex is a must. Use a condom every time to reduce your chances of pregnancy or sexually transmitted infection. Change your condom after each orgasm for the safest sex possible. When you shop condoms from Durex, you’ll enjoy the added bonus of lubrication and increased sensation from ribbing and more. Shop condoms from Durex today.

References

  1. International Society for Sexual Medicine. Do Women Ejaculate? https://www.issm.info/sexual-health-qa/do-women-ejaculate
  2. Rowland, D. & Gutierrez, B. R. Phases of the Sexual Response Cycle. 2017. https://scholar.valpo.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1061&context=psych_fac_pub
  3. Laumann, E. O. et al. Sexual problems among women and men aged 40–80 y: prevalence and correlates identified in the Global Study of Sexual Attitudes and Behaviors. 2004. https://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/myl/ldc/llog.backup/Laumann2005.pdf

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