How to delay ejaculation: Tips

If men want a satisfying time in bed while satisfying their lover in the process, then lasting for a good amount of time during intercourse is absolutely crucial. While no one is expecting you to carry on for several hours, being able to last for at least ten minutes can improve your sex life and your partner’s sex life considerably.

Nonetheless, many men suffer from premature ejaculation, which can be rather embarrassing for both parties. While this condition can cause shame and worry for many men, the good news is that it can be helped, both through natural means and through medication. If you are looking at how to delay ejaculation, read on for a definition of premature ejaculation, some of its potential causes, and what you can do to help it.

In this exclusive guide, we will cover:

What Is Premature Ejaculation and Its Causes
Behavior Techniques
Medication
Conclusion

What Is Premature Ejaculation and Its Causes

The definitions of premature ejaculation differ, but you can be considered to have PE if you finish under 1-3 minutes of having intravaginal intercourse¹. This definition is also stretched for men who consistently finish under five minutes as well as men who seemingly have a lack of control over when they ejaculate. This can lead to sexual anxiety in men, including shame about their bodies and worries over performance inadequacy. It is not something that makes you particularly different, as this affects between 4-39% of all men¹. Some of the key causes of premature ejaculation include, but are not limited to:

Stress
Anxiety
Depression
Worries about premature ejaculation
Relationship problems
Swelling and infection of the urethra or prostate
Irregular hormone levels
Sexual abuse and trauma
Guilty feelings
Rushing sex
Poor body image
Sexual repression
Over-excitement

If you’re facing premature ejaculation, you are not alone. Many men face this issue and it can be distressing for many of them, especially when comparing themselves to other men. However, if you are looking at how to delay ejaculation, there are many simple, yet effective techniques and treatments available to help you increase your control and improve your sexual experience.

It is worth pointing out here that if you have just lost your virginity or you have had sex with someone you consider highly attractive for the first time, and finished before you wanted to, this doesn’t necessarily mean that you have premature ejaculation. This is especially true if you are still in your late teens or early 20s. It probably just means that you were very excited to finally be living your dream. Premature ejaculation points to a more consistent pattern of early climax, and not special one-off situations. In this case, it’s best to relax, take a breather and try again.

How to Control Ejaculation: Behavior Techniques

If you are suffering from premature ejaculation, this can be deeply stressful and even enraging. You might try again and again to stop yourself from ejaculating too soon, but simply feel that the feeling is uncontrollable. The good news is that there are many psychosexual therapies out there, recommended by scientists², that you can use to help yourself from finishing too quickly. Learn how to control ejaculation with the suggestions that we have created for your perusal below:

Edging: The Start and Stop Method

Edging is a technique involving getting as close to climax as possible before waiting patiently until the urge to cum abates. The best thing about this is it allows you to control the sensitivity in your penis and get used to the feeling of ejaculation. Studies suggest that using the stop-start technique increases the time spent enjoying sexual intercourse and can even eliminate the issue. This is even more successful when combined with sphincter control training³. You can try to implement edging in your sex life immediately or use it as a masturbation technique. Either way, the difference in your control will be quickly noticeable.

Sex therapists also recommend using specially-made vibrator toys to assist with premature ejaculation as well⁴!

Pelvic Floor Exercises

Pelvic floor exercises, or Kegel exercises, are a brilliant way to strengthen the muscles that make up your pelvic floor, giving you better control over when — and where — you ejaculate. These are one of many great exercises to last longer in bed naturally! Learn how to use Kegels to delay ejaculation below:

Tense the muscles that you use to pee
Hold the tension for ten seconds
Let go after ten seconds
Repeat in three sets
Practice daily

The best part about Kegel exercises is that once you have mastered the art of stopping yourself from prematurely ejaculating, you can then move on to further sexual exploration, transforming your sex life immeasurably.

Self Distraction

Usually, most people want to forego distractions during sex so they can be fully in the moment. This isn’t recommended if you have premature ejaculation because being hyper-focused can cause you to cum too fast. In these moments where you feel that you are about to cum but you and your partner want to keep going, it’s worth having boring topics in your head that you can distract yourself with. Try thinking about:

Local politics
Work you have to do tomorrow or next week
Cleaning the closet
Sports you have no interest in
Filling out your yearly tax return
Collecting a missing package from the post office
Queueing at the DMV
Complex math problems
Looking at your phone
Paint drying

It goes without saying that you shouldn’t be thinking about sex during these moments. No fantasies or dirty images should pass your mind. The more banal and boring the better, at least until you feel ready to finally climax yourself!

Change up Your Diet

What you eat can have a direct impact on your penile endurance. Unsurprisingly, food that is healthy for you is best for counteracting the issue. If you want to have long-lasting sex, think like a Roman does and eat a Mediterranean diet filled with vegetables, fish, fruits, nuts, and legumes while avoiding red and processed meats⁵. Specific foods recommended for PE are:

Onions
Bananas
Carrots
Eggs
Watermelon
Dark Chocolate
Coffee
Avocado
Walnuts
Mushrooms

If you are unsure how to eat this food as part of a balanced diet, then it is certainly recommended to look up simple recipes that you and your partner can cook together!

Find Your Ideal Weight

There is a strong link between obesity and premature ejaculation⁶. A study shows that men with a waist measurement above 40 inches are three times more likely to suffer from PE too soon. That is why it is essential to make sure that you are working out and watching what you eat to reach the weight that works for you.

Foreplay

If you want to get used to sensitivity in your penis, it can be a bad idea to jump straight into intercourse right away. Instead, you and your partner can try foreplay for you to get used to different feelings and to the feeling of touching your partner. Foreplay can also ease you into sex, meaning that when you start, you can feel more confident. With that said, if you find yourself cumming too fast during foreplay, then it’s worth focusing more on the other recommendations in this article.

It’s also worth pointing out that intercourse is not the be-all and end-all of sexual encounters. Perhaps your partner can give you a mind-melting blowjob, a terrific lubed-up handjob, or sit on your face for extra pleasure. At the end of the day, great sex is about the meaning you derive from it and not simply being able to pump in and out for hours on end.

Masturbation

Masturbation (as well as the most fun you can have by yourself) is a fantastic way to control the sensitivity of your penis as well as practice edging and stop-start techniques. The more that you masturbate the more that you will be used to different sensations, giving you stronger duration during sex. Additionally, if you masturbate a little while before engaging in sex, you will likely be able to last longer once you actually get down to it.

Use Condoms

As condoms have been proven to decrease sensitivity⁷, if you are looking for a great way to last longer in bed without prematurely ejaculating, as well as preventing pregnancies and STDs in the process, then using prolong regular fit condoms is a brilliant idea. Additionally, for extra help, there are condoms that are specifically designed to desensitize the penis and make you last longer, so it’s definitely worth wearing them.

Switch up Positions

When it comes to sex and personal preference, not all positions are created equally. While there isn’t much scientific research on the particulars (yet!), it’s all a matter of the deepness of thrusts and the pleasurability of the sensations. So, if you find yourself quickly ejaculating within five seconds of doggy style or missionary, try sex positions to make him last longer. Perhaps one where the woman is in charge, like cowgirl, sitting chair, or lap dance. It’s also worth bearing in mind that penetration doesn’t have to be the be all and end all of sexual activity, but you and your partner can explore many other ways to enjoy sex without intercourse!

Medication

While counteracting premature ejaculation through natural means is highly recommended, there might still be lingering issues that feel unsolvable. The good news is that you can also try different medications to keep your penis from ejaculating too soon. These include delay sprays which we will cover in detail below.

Delay Sprays + Gels

One of the best ways to keep going is by applying a specially designed formula that can help delay ejaculation. These products contain Benzocaine and/or Lidocaine, which are a special agent that desensitizes the penis and reduces the likelihood of premature ejaculation. They can be applied either in a spray form or as a gel. It’s worth applying a small amount to the head and shaft of the penis 10-15 minutes before intercourse. These can also be combined with special condoms which are especially designed for longer-lasting endurance.

Conclusion

Now that you have read our article, you should have a better idea of how to delay ejaculation and get your sex life back on track. It’s worth bearing in mind that no single technique could be a golden bullet. On the other hand, you may not need to incorporate every single suggestion on this list to obtain better results. This is why it is definitely worth trialing different techniques until you can find yourself lasting longer and enjoying sex more. Make sure not to be too hard on yourself and to have honest conversations with your partner, so you can make the best possible progress.