Oral sex for men comes very high up in the popularity stakes; however, when it comes to oral sex for women, many men are put off by the fact that they might not get it right and many women are put off as they feel shy or embarrassed, even with a long term partner.
Here we look at how to make oral sex better so that you can both enjoy the experience together.
1. Get comfortable
Generally speaking, it can take much longer for a woman to climax during oral sex than it can during penetrative sex. Therefore before you start, make sure that you are both in a comfortable position which you feel relaxed in. Pillows, cushions, and duvets arranged around her body can all help make the experience more relaxing, allowing you the opportunity to experiment with different angles and props to see what works for you.
2. Don’t focus on the orgasm
Both men and women are guilty of concentrating too much on the end goal (the orgasm) than actually enjoying the journey to it, which sometimes can spoil the act completely. Women can often be worried about the length of time it is taking them to climax and hence get nervous that their partner is getting bored.
Whilst men worry that their partner is not climaxing because they are not enjoying what he is doing, despite her enjoying every minute of it. The important thing is to concentrate on relaxing and enjoying the intimate closeness even if she or you don’t climax at all.
3. Listen to her
During oral sex on a woman the full attention is on her, meaning that her partner’s whole mission is to pleasure her and ensure that she enjoys every minute. For this reason, it is important that she gives him vocal cues on the bits she is enjoying the most so that he knows where to concentrate his efforts. He should also pay attention to her body language, her breathing, and how her hips are positioned, which could all give clues as to how much she is enjoying it.
If her hips are rotating in a circular motion or lifting off from the bed then chances are she is hugely turned on and getting lots of pleasure. However, if her legs are squeezing together and her bottom is pushing down tightly to the bed, it might be a sign that something is not comfortable and therefore a cue to try something different.
4. Explore temperature play
Introduce temperature play to elevate the sensations during oral sex. Experiment with contrasting temperatures by sipping on warm or cold beverages beforehand and then incorporating gentle oral touches. The contrast of warmth or coolness can add an exciting element of surprise and heightened pleasure for both partners. Remember to communicate and gauge your partner's comfort levels throughout the experience.
5. Tease with a sex toy
Although the man’s mouth and tongue are the main pleasure-givers during oral sex, there are no rules that say he can’t have a little bit of help along the way. Vibrators and intimate massagers can make the experience much more fun and enjoyable for both parties. He could use the toy to stimulate her clitoris, whilst he explores the other areas of her vagina, and then swap over so that the vibrator is inside her, whilst he pays attention to her clitoris.
Other Tips for Better Oral Sex
When engaging in oral sex, it's important to keep these basic tips in mind to enhance pleasure and create a more satisfying experience for both partners:
Communication is key
Openly discuss desires, boundaries, and preferences with your partner. Everyone is different, so understanding each other's likes and dislikes is crucial for a pleasurable experience.
Take it slow
Oral sex is not a race. Slow, sensual movements and gentle exploration can build anticipation and intensify pleasure. Pay attention to your partner's reactions and adjust your techniques accordingly.
Use your hands
Incorporate your hands into the experience. Gently caress and explore other erogenous zones, such as the breasts, inner thighs, or buttocks, to enhance overall pleasure.
Explore different techniques
Vary your techniques to keep things interesting. Experiment with a combination of licking, sucking, gentle nibbling, and using different pressures to find what feels best for your partner.
Pay attention to the clitoris
The clitoris is highly sensitive and often the key to orgasm for many women. Focus on this area with gentle, circular motions, or try different patterns and speeds to discover what brings your partner the most pleasure.
Practice good hygiene
Make sure both you and your partner maintain proper oral hygiene. Additionally, it's crucial to keep your genital area clean by bathing regularly or using unscented wipes before and after oral sex.
To protect against the transmission of STDs, consider using condoms or dental dams. Flavored condoms, like Durex® Tropical, can even add some added flavor to your oral sex experience!
Remember, every individual has unique preferences, so communication, experimentation, and mutual respect are key. By focusing on your partner's pleasure and staying attuned to their responses, you can create a more enjoyable and intimate oral sex experience
Final Thoughts on Better Oral Sex
Enhancing the experience of oral sex can bring greater pleasure and intimacy to both partners. In this blog post, we explored five practical ways to make oral sex feel better as well as other general oral sex tips. By incorporating these tips into your oral sex repertoire, you can create a more fulfilling and pleasurable experience for both you and your partner.
Resources
Healthline, 2023, Everything You Need to Know About Oral Sex.